2006-06-28
2 weeks
So here I am, finally, in Nova Scotia. Since about two weeks before Leila was born, my thoughts have been constantly drifting to this place, to these quiet streets lined with familiar houses (though the families inside have changed). I realized recently, that this time away has been the longest I have ever been away from this place, verging on a whole seven months.
Parenthood is going amazingly well, with only a few bumps here and there. We have adapted to a new sleep pattern, one which has us both in bed by eight thirty most nights, and I am constantly amazed at the ferocious protectiveness I feel towards my child. We could gaze at Leila for hours at a time laughing at the faces she makes while dreaming and marveling at her little fingers or toes or ears or chubby cheeks or how she changes everyday. Every morning when I lift her up to me I swear she has grown every night. And every day her eyes are brighter and more alert, her hair is fluffier and her arms and legs are stronger.
I am enjoying breastfeeding her more than I ever imagined and have yet to tire of staring at her cheeks and ears move and she sucks and gulps. It amazes me, still, that my body produces something so perfect for her body and I have been taking great satisfaction in this. I have always claimed that a happy mom is really what is best for baby, and if that means a bottle than so be it, and yet these past two weeks my opinion has become somewhat stronger on the subject. But it has been easy for me, my baby wants to eat constantly and her satisfied little gulps make my heart swell.
As far as posting baby pictures goes, I am going to add a link to my Flickr account (but probably not until I am back in Kingston), which will be private. I have no problems posting pictures of myself on the internet and yet am completely wary of pictures of my child. There are so many crazy/desperate for children/sick people out there and I cannot bear the thought of them drooling over pictures of my baby.
Steve has been run off his feet the past two weeks, settling things for the purchase of our house before we left and now getting ready for the wedding on Saturday. We have both accepted that I most likely will not be at the reception since Leila is so much younger than we expected, feeds every two hours, and most importantly, there is no way that I would leave her for more than fifteen minutes while I take a bath, and only then while my mom was in the living room below and I could hear when she started to cry.
As far as visiting goes, she has met all her grandparents, uncles (save one who she will meet in August), great-grandparents and her lone aunt. We have gotten some gentle advise about soothers (which she flat out refuses, to my delight, I hate those things), about introducing juice and water, and of course, about remembering that she is really not to small to spoil and that it does not hurt babies to cry sometimes. As my mom claims, advice is free and you often get what you pay for.
But now she is crying and hungry so I must go.
wunderwuman at 2:58 p.m.