05.26.06
Sex, spicy food. . . what else can there be?
Yesterday? consisted of. . .
- a stretch and sweep
- sex
- spicy foods
- walking
Today? I am still pregnant. Am I bound to be pregnant forever? And probably you are thinking to yourself about how impatient I am because blah blah blah not due for five more days, but people I am going crazy.
My family called me last night from Halifax, from the restaurant where they were having supper with all my aunts and uncles and cousins and close family friends and after I hung up I burst into tears on the couch for no reason mostly, but just because. Steve, despite every wonderful quality he has, has never really understood getting upset over nothing and told me to calm down and relax and what would I rather, be with them or be having a baby? Which, really, did little to make me feel better and I told him I just could not stop crying and I do not know why okay?
My brother is coming tomorrow and I had a crappy sleep last night plagued by dreams of ruptured placentas and dogs.
I read about the mother not being ready for labour actually prolonging the birth, emotional blah blah blah. And then the midwife said yesterday that she thought the last month of pregnancy was really just getting you ready to want to give birth because the baby is fully functional. And I thought I was ready and then after she said that I thought that maybe I had pushed some crazy issue into the back of my mind and I am not really emotionally ready to give birth or to be a mom and what if this baby is two weeks late? So I thought and thought about it and sure, the idea of a human being head emerging from my vagina (my vagina that sometimes gets sore from a penis, no less) kind of, well, makes me a little nervous, but other than the normal fears or C-sections and not being able to take the pain and somehow squirting poop onto someone, I really think I am ready.
Did I mention that yesterday she said my cervix was so soft that it was a little hard to identify at first? And that, oh yeah she touched my babys head? (Is it weird that the first question I thought of was if the baby had a lot of hair?) Anyway, this entry is boring even me so I am going to go dust and vacuum in an attempt to distract myself from being pregnant for a while and maybe, just maybe, it will send me into labour.
Does anyone have any magical home remedies for getting things going?
wunderwuman at 3:16 p.m.