03.25.02
No one will know
I've been missing people who aren't here. Eva, Amanda, my brother. It feels as though my life is a waiting game lately. Waiting on acceptance letters, on a job, for the summer to come, then I'll start waiting for the fall. It makes me wonder how well I've actually been living.
Twice today, I saw someone I knew on campus walking ahead of me, but didn't bother to try and catch up. Didn't really care. Sometimes I barely care at all about anything, and it feels like anything barely cares about me.
I keep having strange dreams. Last night I woke up about seven times throughout the night. Twice, I jumped awake, startled out of sleep by a dream that I don't remember. But I was scared. The second time I stayed sitting up for a few minutes, waiting for my heart to slow down. Zach rolled over and in his sleep pulled me back down to the bed. Put his arm around me and said, "Kaitlyn, I love you." I smiled and settled into his hug.
I hate being premenstrual. But at least it explains this sadness.
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