4.29.09

Lacking Energy

I'm having a hard time getting motivated to do, well, anything.

I get to the gym three times a week and keep the house and laundry at a dull roar, but seriously, I've been exhausted all week. I started a new pill on Friday and I'm wondering if it's my body getting used to the new hormones (estrogen!! What's this?!). Today in a workout class that is usually fairly intense, I was left shaking just laying in the floor during the last ten minutes because I physically could not get my legs to do any hip flexor extensions or whatever.

I'm scattered too, which may be because the house is in an uproar and also at a standstill until the basement is finished. It's been sunny and beautiful, but dragging the wagon to the park? Ugh, only because the dog is driving me crazy and Leila keeps asking to go.

I felt this way for a lot of the summer after we moved to Oromocto and was very freaked out by it at the time (depression? imminant death?), so maybe it's just how I react to moving or something? By exhaustion and a little bit of the blues? I don't know. But heaven help my online course because I am so beyond behind and I can't seem to focus on it when I open the books.

Steve was away last night, but has the day off tomorrow. Taxes will be filed, and my younger brother who is now staying in Halifax for the summer (and hopefully forever?) is coming over for supper. The girls love him so much and they have such fun together, this is the first time since I've had kids that any of our family has been in the same place as us, so it's really quite a nice treat. It does leave me nostalgic for my older brother though, and the fact that he won't see them until December, and I really wish he'd move back out east. But he's happy with his life and his girlfriend and in the past few months, he has seemed to grow into a new place (individually and with her) and seems settled, and strong and self-aware for the first time, since, well, ever. It's a whole 'nother bucket of worms that I probably won't ever get into here, but let's leave it with I'm so, so proud of him, so happy that he found someone so great for him and miss him desperately, especially when I watch Liam with the girls and wish he could be here, too.

Anyway, that's all. There's a pile of laundry on my couch, sheets on my bed that haven't been changed in too long and two girls napping, so I must go and slowly move about the house trying to get enough motivation to get something done.

wunderwuman at 12:32 p.m.

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