4.18.09
Long and Rambling
Yesterday I spent the day driving to my parents' house, dropping the girls off so I could go to a funeral and then two hours back home. I got home in time for supper and to put the girls to bed. I was cranky and tired and feeling crappy and told Steve as much, he fell asleep while I read for a while.
This morning was my Saturday morning kick boxing class, home for a late nap for Alena, scrubbing bathroom drawers (they were unfit to even put our things in before they were cleaned), unpacking bathroom stuff, scrubbing counters, sinks, toilets, tubs, mopping floors (I hate mopping). Fed Leila, put her down for her nap, Alena woke, fed and played with her, Leila woke. Stripped her bed and threw her sheets and sookie blanket in the wash because she peed. Finished cleaning the daily kitchen stuff (unloading and loading dishwasher, counters, sinks, swept, etc) went for a 1km walk (Leila walks most of it now, with Alena in the stroller and Milo's finally at a place (read: old enough) to be off leash the whole time. Realized Alena's blankey was still in the washing machine so her second nap wouldn't happen. Ran down and threw the sheets in the dryer, loaded the girls in the car for a half an hour so Alena would sleep, came home, threw a pizza in the oven, set the table, Steve got home we ate supper, bathed the girls, made the beds got them settled and... I still have school work to do.
Steve's shifts are messed up this week, so he's working all weekend and doesn't get a day off until Thursday. It makes for long days and I'm still not used to him not getting home at lunch, so I miss him.
I'm tired though, and instead of doing school work, I just read my book tonight (The Book of Negroes, a MUST read!).
There's nothing much to say, as I still haven't made it to a playgroup, although I'm enjoying some new fitness classes and the girls seem to like the child drop off there. The basement is under construction and it's a constant battle to keep the house managable. I'm telling myself it will all be finished by the end of next month (which is also Alena's first birthday!!! UNBELIEVABLE!).
She's bonafide crawling now, but has little time for it, and will sit and yell at me or Steve instead of crawling over to us, because she just wants to walk walk walk while holding our hands. She mimics everything, blowing kisses. Leila is wonderful, still. Anxious at times, still, and very worried I'm going to leave her at the gym, very worried Steve isn't going to come home from work. She's a sensitive soul and always has been and at times my heart breaks for how the world seems a much harsher place for those who are softer and I hope she'll be ok.
She's starting to get fairly skinny and doesn't seem to have much toddler left in her, and I can see her ribs and spine, and is now agreeing to eat one bite of vegetables at each dinner as long as she can rinse it down with milk. She already likes cukes and tomatoes and sometimes baby carrots, the other night she had a piece of green bean. This is HUGE for us. While she eats healthy by anyone's standards, and eats any type of fruit you'd put in front of her, she hasn't eaten veggies since about eight months old. Up until very recently, she would hold them in her mouth until forced to swallow and then just throw up on her plate (I'm not even exaggerating!).
We talked about it and I told her that part of growing stronger was having to eat the food that fuels your body and vegetables are one of the best types of fuel. But a bite of cooked green bean! It's big news in this house.
Anyway, the only other thing is that I apcked away the baby clothes. I folded each little pair of sleepers, each little outfit and cute onesie and my size small Fuzzi Bunz and kissed them and laid them in a box labeled "Baby Girl Clothes" and yes, I cried a little. Not for what is gone, but for how fast it went. The future looks beautiful from here, but those moments a gone now and wasn't I only 15 a few heartbeats ago? *Sigh* So the box is in Alena's closet, waiting to be taped shut and then put into our storage room in the basement once it's finished. I put a lot of their clothes in it, basically anything that was still in good shape or had sentimental value. In another few (five?) years, I know I'll go through it again and weed it out, down to homemade outfits, special sweaters, jammies they came home from the hospital in, that sort of thing. And although I don't think we'll have any more children, I'm not quite ready to say, "Never again." Not just yet, anyway.
In fact, sometimes I downright do want another child. Sometimes I hear the whisper in my ear that there's someone else yet to come. We've talked about adopting an older child. I mean between 18 months and 3 years, once Alena's older. The child would be younger than her, so in three or four years looking into it. Anyway, all it's been is a couple conversations to know that we are both open to the idea and will see what our life is like in a few years. As far as biological goes, I don't have a burning desire to be pregnant again, but I haven't even been without child in my body for a year, so once Alena gets closer to two, I may change my mind, who knows. Right now we say no more (Steve more emphatically than I), but life unfolds and sometimes it doesn't unfold the way we expect.
Anyway, enough rambling! Must go read more.
wunderwuman at 9:25 p.m.